Clare And James, Part Two: That Time Clare Told James How Adam Once Fucked Her Up The Arse
A city break. Five stars.
Back from the bathroom. Clare smiles at James as she calms down in the restaurant chair. She is distracted, sits on the side of the saddle for a moment looking back at the door through which she has just entered.
“Is everything okay?” James asks.
“You men,” she said, turning to him and sliding her bare legs under the table. I should never have listened to you.
“Did a guy come to you?” His eyes are gleaming waiting. “I told you it would be interesting if you took off your ring. Dressed like that, you look great, baby.
“Shhh! That’s him. She leads with her eyes. “Over there. These three men have just entered the room.
“Did any of them tell you anything?”
“The big one. Oh, my God, he’s looking that way.
“Yes, he did.”
“He’s not looking now. Tell me what happened.
“He was waiting for me outside the ladies, asked me my name and if I was a guest.”
“Did you drive it on?”
“I promised, didn’t I?”
The waitress arrives to pick up their order. When the girl leaves, Clare asks James, “Is he the kind of guy you had in mind? The kind you imagine to fuck me. An old gentleman. He has a certain air, seems someone who has done well for himself. If it was my say-so, I would choose a guy like him, an older guy. Actually, I’d choose Phil. Oh, I didn’t say, did I? This extraordinarily handsome, older gentleman, the one at this table, his name is Phil.
She takes a sip of her glass before continuing. “You’re not looking at each other, James. Didn’t you expect that to be what it would be if I ever had to play your fantasy? Maybe this is the beginning here right now. This very handsome, older man could be the one you have prepared me for, the one you want me to bring back to our room and watch me fuck.
“Not so strong. Please, Clare. He looks around her, then stares at her with an imposing look.
“I’m not noisy.” She’s going this way and that. The room is buzzing with Saturday night dinners. There’s laughter, chatter, glass lapping, cutlery-scratching dishes. “See? No one pays us any attention.
“Okay, but did it really come to you?”
“What if he did, or didn’t?” She’s waiting for her answer. But he only looks at the group of men who settle down at their table. “You’re not ready, are you?” she said. The best stick to the stories so far, eh, James?”
“Don’t be like that. You took me by surprise, that’s all. I was thinking more about the club later. A club is more suitable for flaunting yourself.
“Look at me, James.” She’s holding her eye. “Do I look like the kind of woman who has to be flaunted? One look at me is all it takes.
“Then you gave him the come-on.”
“We exchanged glances, that’s all.”
“When did you exchange those glances?”
“In the bar, while I waited for you to come down. That’s what you wanted to happen, the reason you sent me there without my ring.
“It’s all happening so fast.”
“You should be happy. I am. He looked at me, and when I looked at him, he smiled at me. Then he called the bartender, made me pour another drink, raised his glass to let me know. I smiled at him, his mouth: “Thank you.” He was with his friends. They were laughing. But not at home. You know, having fun. You remember, don’t you, James?
“How to have fun with friends? Why don’t we have friends, James?
“I have friends. You have Emma and your sister.
“I mean good friends, fun friends.”
“I’m more interested in what old git randy told you apart from the ladies?”
“He said there was going to be a party later, in his room, and I’d like to join him and his friends, and a few other friends too.”
“Did you tell him you’re married?”
“Of course. I even asked if you could come to his party.
“And what did he say?”
“He said you might not be too happy with what he had in mind.”
“Then I told him that he would be surprised at what makes my husband happy, that you are not like most men.”
“Do you really want him?” He looks closely at her as she looks at the men’s table again.
“Wouldn’t I say no to any of them?”
“I think we should slow down,” James says.
“Follow yourself.” She takes another sip of her glass. “But don’t dare say I wasn’t ready to give your sad little fantasy a go.”
Back at the restaurant and back in their room, James wants to talk a little more about Adam.
“I wish I could see you with him, I was there when he fucked you.”
“He wouldn’t have lit you up, James. You wanted to kill him. The two of us.
“Only if I had stepped on you, found you together; only if I had never suspected – then I could have felt that way. But I had time to take it on board, imagine the moment and appreciate its erotic beauty. So now I think, when we get home maybe you should text that guy from Adam, that he’s visiting him. Only this time, I’ll be here to watch.
“You can forget about that!”
“Come on, Clare. It would be so hot.
“For you, maybe.” She was silent for a moment, remembers her last time with Adam, how she had hurt him. “I must have been brutal when I broke up. I won’t go back. No way! Besides: it would not be the same. Your imagination makes it something it never was. Something for sure. She takes a sip of her glass before continuing. “Our relationship was never safe. We were on the edge of the precipice.
“What do you mean?”
“I mean…” She stops, looking for the right words. “When he started, I had to keep my feelings to him in check. If it had not turned out so needy, God only knows where it might have led.
“You mean you might have left me?”
“You weren’t there for me at the time. Remember? You were wrapped up in your work, and I felt so alone. And then Adam came and saved me from my sweetness. He validated me.
“You’re really the slut who keeps giving.”
“What does that mean?”
“At first it was all, ‘Oh James, I had this quick with a guy from work, but you don’t need to be upset, it was just a sex thing.” Now you tell me that you had feelings for this guy, that if he hadn’t gone all scary on you, you could have left me.
“I would never have left you for Adam. I loved you then, and I love you now.
“Don’t play martyr, Clare.”
She stands up, goes to the minibar to get a drink. “I want one?” she asks. He’s not answering.
“Have they been other men. Lovers before Adam?” he asks.
“You know there was Dave before you.”
“I mean since we’ve been together.”
“None since we got married,” she says.
But there are things she could still tell him, stories she won’t let slip until the time is right. In the early months of her relationship with James, still reeling from her breakup with Dave, she had slept with so many men. An endless chain of torrid one night stands.
She wanted James to be just another quick fuck. But then she had gone and fell for her suave veneer, her gentle manners and generous wallet. His rise ensured in the business world he lived in. But it was later. It had taken months before she realized James was the only one.
During those first few weeks with him, she had lived a life kept secret from him. A life of sexual abandonment. Months of secret Tinder dates, crazy sex nights with equally senseless men. She remembers the texts James sent her when he went out with other guys, those sweet words expressing his devotion. Often she would text back while sitting in front of her date – sometimes from a bed that her lover slept.
What a slut she had made herself in her broken despair over Dave’s infidelity, their five years denied by the cunt of her treacherous best friend Gillian. Sleeping around was to be her revenge, to be served up hot piping, if she never had the happen to lay the table and dish à la carte. Turns out that after all that fucking Dave didn’t matter anymore.
She tells herself how there will be time for these tales soon enough. But until then, she will milk her dry memory with stories of Adam.
And so she begins to lay the foundations for a whole new fantasy, hoping that her confession will not be beyond the pale. His determination is shaken, his mind inflamed by visceral sexual remorse. But the thrill will come in the saying. The sweet sadism of it is incomparable. The idea of that the eggs on.
“Yous know what you like, but I never did? She asks him.
She laughs, but her payload is not disarmed. “I’m not talking about food. I’m talking about that other thing. She’s waiting. “The thing we tried once. Your birthday, remember?
“You mean … anal?
She hates that word.
“Oh, Jeez, Clare!”
“Don’t get so hurt. There’s a good side to that.
“How can there be a good side — to that!”
Look at it this way: I like to take it now.
Top of the board: triple twenty! She holds her gaze and nods the door an affirmation, smiles a blissful smile knowing as her eyes radiate with luminous joy. The thrill of tormenting him mindh that, his most shameful truth is the rarest of drugs, an exotic mixture, so difficult at the source that lately, his hiding place diminished by all say it all.
And when Adam’s fund goes bankrupt, God will forbid us what other truths will be dredged and told. Or, as he wants, will she be driven to look for new lovers so that she can provide her next dose, deliver the despicable rush they both came looking for?
But, for now, there is still Adam.
“With him!” James said. “Really? You let him fuck you in the ass after you knew him for a while. Just days!” His disbelief, his stunned horror are uncontrollable.
She nods with one eye. His eyes don’t waver.
His pain and accusations in his eys, the darkness streaks his tone. “You always said you hated him, said you would never again. So why with him. Why-the-fuck with him!
“I couldn’t help it. The thought of him in me — you know, out there, deeper than deep can be … I know it’s perverse, but I couldn’t help it. Before I finished it, I wanted him to have all the means I could.
“You keep telling me how big he was. Wasn’t he too big for you?
“That’s what I thought when he asked if he could.”
“Oh, he just dated her, did he? Said: “Please, Clare: I would fuck you in the ass?
“Adam would never have said it like that! No, we were in bed.
“In our bed?”
“That’s right, James, where else but in our bed? And I hadn’t changed the sheets either, and when I went face down, I could feel you on them. It was like you were with us.
She studies it, relishing the impact of his words. He now suffers, the ferocious warmth of his mind synthesising this basic metal with raw facts, his vile confession transmuted into sexual gold.
“He was kneeling between my legs holding his cock, rubbing the end of it on my pussy. But instead of pushing it, it started sliding up and down. Slowly at first, up to my pubic and back between my legs to the crack of my. I was so wet. You should have seen — touched me there. His cock was covered with my cum, and I was all fat to him as he went up and down, his end raw deep into my split. It was a beautiful feeling, it really was.
“But he didn’t put it in me, continued to rub me with it. There was something different in his own way. A hesitation. He was like a little boy who wanted to ask me something, but couldn’t snatch courage. When he became motionless, put his cock to the crack of my ass, I asked if everything was okay.
“He said he wanted to try something with me, something an old girlfriend had liked, but his present didn’t. I had no idea what he meant until he pushed his cock between my buttocks.
“Don’t you realize when you thought a slut, to ask you to do something like that when he barely knew you?”
“You don’t understand, do you, James? Adam loved me, he loved me too much. That was the problem, and why I put an end to it. That day, I had already decided that it was over, and I intended to tell him when we were dressed. He’d take it badly, I already knew that. I wanted to soften the blow, make our last time together unique.
She’s breathing. Her mind is back on the bed with Adam, remembering how she was mentally preparing to endure what was to come.
“I was so scared it would hurt too much. But he saw my apprehension and asked me if I had ever done it this way with you. I said yes and I hated it. He said it would be different with him because he would be sweet, that he knew the right way.
“So what did Mr. Loverboy do that was so different?”
“He took his time, prepared me. First he came down on me, started licking my, my clitf. He really went into town on me there, gave me with his tongue and was so patient. It continued until I was neither here nor there with excitement. And then, when I was in that other space, that other state of mind, he moved his mouth down so that his tongue began to slam my perineum. She looks James in the eye and asks, “Why have you ever kissed me there, James?”
You mean he licked your? He looks at her, his sweet wife has made a stranger. She abandoned all the illusions that had once seduced her.
“He wanted me, James, so longed for me that no part of me was off-limits. And for me, knowing such a perfect physical specimen of masculinity was so much in love with me… It was exquisite, intoxicating. When his hands, then the mouth… How do you describe it? She’s looking for words. ” The pleasure of his touch and his kisses mingled with the knowledge that without even trying to make him fall in love with me. And now he loved me so much that he wanted to taste me even there. Even this horrible place. She takes her drink and takes another sip. “It was a fucking intoxicating journey, James. My God, you should have seen him, like he went crazy for me.
James has his head in his hands.
“Are you all right?” she asks. Now his tone is tender, caring.
He lifts his head, looks at her directly. I said, “Come on. I need to know everything.
“Are you sure?”
I said, “Absolutely.”
“You recently said that we have to be 100 per cent honest with each other. Is that enough honesty?
“Is there anything wrong with me, do you think, Clare? Why do I like to hear this stuff so much?
“Many men love their wives to talk dirty.” She goes towards him, sits on her lap. His voice is husky with excitement. “I can stop if you want. Do you want me to stop, James.
“That’s the last thing I want?”
“You can’t imagine what it’s like to have someone’s tongue in such an intimate place. The strangeness of it, the taboo thrill of it. If you could have measured my excitement, it would have broken all the dials, the hands off the ladder!
She kisses James on the lips, sends her tongue in search of herown. The passion of his response threatens to overwhelm him. She breaks up, says, “I have to say it all now. If I don’t, I’ll never do it.
He said, “I don’t know if I can listen anymore. I want to lick you like him. Right away! And then I want to fuck you in the ass, in your tight, dirty hole, like he did.
“Soon. I promise. But first, you have to be careful what I say. Before she goes on, she waits for him to calm down, to attend. It is only then that it proceeds.
“He turned me over on my stomach and spread my legs and used his fingers to separate the ache from my buttocks. Then his face was up close, his mouth dribbling saliva on my exposed asshole. When his tongue started on me, I squeezed. He licked my little butt from my back to my, always following the crack of my, going further with each pass. Finally, his tongue grew deep in the crevasse. He came and went, coming up and down, sometimes darting into my asshole passing by. Then he settled down a little bit, got comfortable. He rested his chin so that his thatch shaved my perineum before his tongue began his serious investigation.
“His saliva, abundantly applied, massage in me and dribble more until I was soaked. And then it started. A finger at first. I have no idea who. Temporarily circling, giving me pleasure like I could never have imagined; wild surges, nerve-electrifying shivers of happiness. My god. Kiss me, James. Please.
They embrace long and deep, his passion now a match for his. But she breaks up again, must continue her story. “And then he placed two pillows under my belly. He tells me not to resist, ‘Let your muscles unravel, Clare. Relax. Release. And all the time his finger probe so gently, massage the tension in my sphincter, sometimes break to harvest sperm from my, applying it to where it was needed. His fingertip started to loosen me. Then another finger; Then two fingers; three fingers. Finally, he said, “I think you’re ready.
“I had my face, my cheek, flat on the undersheet, and I could feel your afterShave. It was if you were there, just a moment before he fucked me. It was a little soothing to be aware of you. You see, James, I was thinking about you at the time. I was no longer anxious, but my need was extreme. I was desperate for his cock to be in me. I closed my eyes, I felt it behind me, its weight soaking the mattress in the middle. He brushed his dick up and down the crack in my butt over and over again. Lubricated by his spitting, my sweat and my sperm, he has now poured something, cold and viscous to cool the mixture. The leg cream from my dresser.
“When about to begin, he asked, “Ready? I did not have time to respond. He pushed, and something gave. Then a previous backwater of my body rose in rebellion, and his cock led a brutal repression.
So it still hurts, after all his?
“For a moment, there was real pain. But only at the beginning. Then there was just the thrill of it, little old me allowing him this incredibly erotic transgression. She chooses her words, draws from her yoga practice to explain how she feels. “I have never been so embodied, so concentrated, so completely in the moment. When he walked in to me, it was the most sublime of violations. His cock sent wave after wave of pleasure running through my body.
“Did he have his dick all the way in?” James asks.
For Clare, her husband’s voice has become the voice of a stranger, and it makes her happy to know that she has reduced her world, ambitious man to a pathetic bundle of need simpering. “He took his time,” she says. “Inch by inch. It wasn’t until the dish of his abdomen was against my buttocks that I realized how deep it was, how completely it was in me. And do you know what i was most pleased with, James?
“What was it?” he asks, his voice muted. It’s as if he was about to have the secrets of the universe fell on his knees.
“I loved the way he was so deep inside me, so deep that his balls brushed against my pussy as he fucked me. That’s how he was in me. And then he fucks me like my ass is my pussy. And it was glorious, and I was giving a thumbs-up, humming my butt against him, sometimes screaming the frantic sweet pain of it all. I had to be very strong, James, because the next day, Mrs. Henderson next door gave me a funny look.
“I slipped my hand under me and snuck in as it saved me. And then he was cumming, gave a monumental moan as he tried to push himself into me further than he would ever be able to. Oh, James! The sensation of his pulsating cock inside me, sending his sperm to the deepest part of me. Imagine it! My fingers work frantically, and then I was cumming too. Everything was out of my control.
James relieved Clare of his knee, went to get his cream for the legs of the dresser. She is rarely without her, is proud of her smooth and silky legs. “Is it the same tube?” He asks, pick it up and looking at the label. “I want you to take off your clothes and laugh a pillow under your belly,” he says.
Clare does what she is told and is happy that his cock is not like Adam
“You don’t have to be Adam,” James says. He’s lying on his back next to Clare looking at the ceiling.
“Shouldn’t be Adam, what?”
“It may be another guy I can watch you fuck. We could find someone else. Someone tonight.
“So you said earlier. Look how it turned out.
“But I want that to happen tonight. While your is full of my sperm.
“You’re not on a club yet, are you?” He’s obsessed, she’s telling herself. After all that has been said — and now done — he continues to talk about her and other men. “Do do you have someone in mind?
He ignores his snark, says. “In the club, you could dance on your own. See who’s interested in you. I was looking at it from afar discreetly.
I said, “Okay. If that’s what you want. It’s a problem. So this imaginary guy, how do you think he’s going to come down when I tell him I have a husband who wants to watch?
“I thought I might just watch you dance with someone – to begin with, maybe see him kiss you while you dance. You know, see how I handle something like that.
She remembers her days of clubbing, all those men. The thrill of a stranger’s touch is so appealing right now.
“Wasn’t that fucking me in the ass enough for you?”
“Okay, if you’re not in the mood for a club. How about sliding towards the bar on your own for half an hour, see if this guy who spoke to you earlier is still on?
“Why don’t you go straight to his room. He gave me his number.
“And you would, too, wouldn’t you.”
“I thought me copping off was what this weekend is all about… Or was I wrong? I did it because you are sending me conflicting messages.
“I don’t know what I want anymore.”
I said, “Okay. I’m going to play it safe. Another drink at the bar, I hope, another harmless flirt. How does the sound sound?
Anything to escape James’ conversation about other men. Even if it means finding another man.
She gets up and goes to the convenient mirror, sits down and takes care of her hair and retouches her makeup. When she’s done, she takes her armpit bag and gets up, turns to James and says, “WIll I do?”
“You look sensational. The men will line up to spend time with you.
And she does feel sexy in her new short cocktail dress. With his freshly oiled legs, they are ready to part for any decent halfway guy looking that comes his way. But his is like a black hole, it’s wrong now a memento mori of its flourishing depravity.
“And you don’t mind if a man tries to pick me up?”
“As long as it’s just talking.”
“What will you do if I find myself in a guy’s room?” she says, albeit with doubts that she will see a stranger’s room tonight. But that’s what he wants to hear, and so she plays the role he assigned her, the one she’s more than willing to assume. One day, rehearsals will be done and it will be the opening night.
“You can always ring for an escort,” she says before turning around and walking to the door. She’s unpacking the lock. At the last minute she turns around and says, “Areyou you not going to kiss me – wish me luck?”
He doesn’t come to her, he sits and stares.
“Please yourself. It’s better not to wait.
Clare and James, Part Two: This time Clare tells James How Adam once fucked up to the Arse